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Posts tagged why is everybody shitting on classics?

Posted 6 months ago

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Spartacus: Blood and Sand More like Spartacus: Blood and SUCK, am I right More like Spartacus: Blood and SWEET JESUS! NAKED LADIES, am I right? Unfortunately, the show is balls of the highest order. It’s not even dumb fun the way 300 was; in fact, this looks like 300 on a tight budget. A very tight budget. The acting was atrocious, the sets were cheap-looking, and the CGI hurt my face. I loved the disclaimer in the beginning that said that the violence, language, and sexual activity on the show was supposed to be faithful to what the Romans and surrounding peoples did. As if it was really necessary to have the Thracians go around saying ‘cunt!’ all the time. I can let the historical inaccuracies pass (I’m not really up to speed on my Roman history anyways); it usually gets shunted into oblivion for the sake of drama and whatnot in these sorts of things. But with all that, the drama is sorely lacking, and the storytelling just isn’t compelling. And all the gratuitous swearing and sex made it feel like it was a wish-fulfillment type of deal written by a teenager. The swearing isn’t even done well, and the violence looks cheap. After the first episode, I don’t really care about any of the characters (hell, I don’t even know their names), or what happens to them. Not even full frontals or Lucy Lawless can make me watch this show again. OK, maybe booze. Lots of it. Zoom

Spartacus: Blood and Sand

More like Spartacus: Blood and SUCK, am I right More like Spartacus: Blood and SWEET JESUS! NAKED LADIES, am I right? Unfortunately, the show is balls of the highest order. It’s not even dumb fun the way 300 was; in fact, this looks like 300 on a tight budget. A very tight budget. The acting was atrocious, the sets were cheap-looking, and the CGI hurt my face.

I loved the disclaimer in the beginning that said that the violence, language, and sexual activity on the show was supposed to be faithful to what the Romans and surrounding peoples did. As if it was really necessary to have the Thracians go around saying ‘cunt!’ all the time.

I can let the historical inaccuracies pass (I’m not really up to speed on my Roman history anyways); it usually gets shunted into oblivion for the sake of drama and whatnot in these sorts of things. But with all that, the drama is sorely lacking, and the storytelling just isn’t compelling. And all the gratuitous swearing and sex made it feel like it was a wish-fulfillment type of deal written by a teenager. The swearing isn’t even done well, and the violence looks cheap. After the first episode, I don’t really care about any of the characters (hell, I don’t even know their names), or what happens to them. Not even full frontals or Lucy Lawless can make me watch this show again.

OK, maybe booze. Lots of it.

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